It Was A Triumph, Darling

A couple of weeks ago, someone on my team invited me to a meeting to talk about an event being planned for prospective customers. They wanted my input and ideas. In reality, they had no ideas!

So I wrote a script for an interactive play that would make real the benefits of our software solution. I was the playwright, casting director, one of the actors, and director. Word got around about what was being planned, and our company executives seemed to like the concept, but since nothing like this had ever been done before, everyone (including and especially me) was plenty nervous. We had 8 airlines coming from China, Brazil, the US, Algeria, Chile, and Canada. I was worried about the different cultures coming together - would they think it was fun or painful?

Wednesday night I helped set up the ballroom of the hotel. Our set included check-in desks, a VIP lounge (complete with bar), economy waiting area, and even a plane. We handed out unique characters to each customer (I wrote those too) and asked them to act the part. It seemed like all the men got women characters and vice versa, which was pretty funny.Two of the characters I wrote were a grandmother and teenage granddaughter. A man from Brazil was the grandmother, and a Chinese man was the granddaughter. When we called early boarding for passengers needing extra assistance, they walked hand in hand to the steps, grandma walking with a limp. I didn't write that part, but they were having so much fun they did it anyway!

My boss played the First Officer of my fictional airline, and my Senior Vice President was our Captain. My SVP told me that morning (before the show) that he rarely ever says "wow", but he was saying it now. The event was a rousing success, and two of the prospective customers even asked us to take our show on the road to perform for their executives. One of my friends from London was in town, and he said that after a successful performance, stage players say "It was a triumph, darling". I thought that summed it up well.

I Did Something Today I Haven't Done in 28 Years

Oh stop thinking you know what it is. And you - get your mind out of the gutter right now.

The last time I did this, I was 20 years old. The Philadelphia Phillies won their first (and only) World Series that year.

A month after I did it, John Lennon was shot and killed (not that I had anything to do with it).

Drum roll please....

Today, I voted.

And before you start yelling at your computer monitor about how un-American I am, let me tell you this. I feel bad. I should have voted in countless elections - God knows I had an opinion on some of them. But apathy has rules my political life since 1980.

So what broke me out of my habitual laziness? This is the first year I really felt like what was happening was impacting me personally. My retirement fund lost more than $70,000 in a matter of weeks, and I didn't have that much to begin with. I never agreed with the war in Iraq, and I've been proven right. I travel internationally a lot, and the last couple of years I've been a little nervous. I haven't gone so far as some of my coworkers that put a Canadian flag on everything they own in order to fool people into thinking they're not American, but it's a little scary walking around some places these days.

And the folks getting Social Security are getting a cost of living raise - about time. The Minimum Wage is going up too - again, about time. But I haven't had a raise, cost of living or otherwise, for several years either. Don't get me wrong - I have a good standard of living, and I've been lucky - I love my job. I just wish I could really experience the "American Dream" by paying off my credit cards, car, mortgage, etc. and getting that lake house in Minnesota.

Am I asking for too much?

Cleaning & Other Thoughts

The winter doldrums have officially set in.

During the summer in Minnesota, I worked hard all day (and some nights). Friday afternoon I'd race around to clean the place up in preparation for the weekend. I'd finish in about 45 minutes or so.

Here in Texas, I work hard all day (and some nights). I don't race around in preparation for the weekend, because I have nothing to look forward to. What took me 45 minutes at the lake never gets done. 400 square feet to clean vs. 1500 square feet; no cat hair vs. 6 cats that spread themselves everywhere; energy to spare 'cuz it's almost lake time vs. no energy 'cuz it's just another weekend.

In brighter news, I've got some social events coming up to look forward to.

First up is our semi-annual customer conference, here in Texas this time. It's always a good time seeing folks from around the globe and spending the nights partying with them.

My buddy Lisa is a singer and songwriter, and she's singing at the best hotel/restaurant in Dallas November 7. She says that there are lots of single rich dudes that hang out there, and I get to hang out at the bar all night on her dime. I'm practicing the phrase "I'm with the band" in preparation. She also sings at Dallas Cowboy games, and gets a suite for the game. I guess I need to learn more about football and country music!

Then December 6 our boss is having a Christmas party, even though our company has put the kibosh on spending money. He's always paid for it out of his own pocket anyway, and this year is no different.

Then Christmas parties and open houses. The last Christmas party is held in mid-January every year by a former executive with our company. He's been inviting me for years, and I've only been able to make it twice. He and his wife are great folks, so I hope I can make it this year.

Church vs State

I heard on the radio today that a Catholic diocese here in Fort Worth had issued a letter telling Catholics that if they vote for a candidate that supports legal abortion they'll burn in hell. It was read in Mass last Sunday in some, if not all, Fort Worth churches.

Here's my opinion. Whether it's a Catholic, Muslim, Baptist, Buddhist, Morman, Hindu, or Jewish religion, you have no business messing with the politics. If you choose to do so, you need to lose your tax-exempt status! I think it's fine to come out against abortion if that's what the church stance is, but to suggest that voting for a particular candidate is "morally impermissible" goes too far.

I'm all for free speech - but only for those that pay taxes.

What do you think?

Salt Lake City Silly

I spent a couple of days in Salt Lake City this week on business. The weather was crisp, the skies were sunny, and the mountains were gorgeous.

I got upgraded to First Class both ways, so life was good. And I got to enjoy one of my favorite beers while there - Polygamy Porter. Their slogan is "Why have just one?".

GPS Adventures

I was told several years ago that I have a directional dyslexia disorder, meaning I get lost a lot. Well-meaning folks try to give me directions, and don't understand why I can't find the place. In my head, I have the same response if someone asked me to multiply the square root of pi by 5106. My neurons go into overdrive and shoot sparks everywhere until everything shorts out.

So last year I broke down and bought a Tom Tom. Finally, I thought, I'll never get lost again.

Right.

A couple of times it has told me to turn right...into a river. Bad things can happen if you rely on a GPS.

Today, I set it for my doctor's appointment in downtown Fort Worth. "You have reached your destination", it said. I looked around, and said, "right". If my destination is a mortuary in a very bad part of town I have reached my destination. Guessing I wasn't dead yet, I checked the address I put in. Well, the darn thing is picky, and wants to know if I'm going to East Terrell or West Terrell. I picked the wrong one, and ended up several miles off target.

I love technology, and this device has saved my butt more than once. And, until I'm rich and have my own driver, it's the best I'm gonna get.

Diet Days

I went to the local grocery store this afternoon, where the after-church crowd was in full force. Ladies wearing their Sunday best (including hats) jammed the aisles. As I was waiting to check out, I looked at the basket of the folks in front of me.

Potato chips, tortilla chips, sausage, Dr. Pepper, and...one Lean Cuisine. It made me laugh, until I looked at my own cart.

A twelve-pack of Slim Fast, chicken tenders, and a six-pack of beer. Hopefully the Slim Fast will balance out the beer. I guess those that live in glass houses....

Regional Differences

I had to laugh when, in the middle of the biggest economic crisis we've seen since the Great Depression, I opened my browser to the Fargo Forum homepage.

"Breaking News", it said. "AC/DC to play in Fargo in January".

Wow.

A couple of times since I've been back in Texas, I find myself following pickup trucks with "In Memory of..." stenciled on the back windshield or even on the truck body. What's that all about?