Ugh, This is Hard. Day 52

You know those stories about the overweight people that have weight loss surgery and magically become thin overnight?  Yeah well, I'm here to tell you it's an urban myth!

The surgery removes an obstacle for you, but the rest is up to you.  If I didn't work the program I can stay at my previous weight or even gain weight.  There is nothing stopping me from doing that.

What are my struggles?  Exercise was a big one.  When I first started walking about 6 weeks ago I would huff and puff, my knees hurt, my thighs hurt, my ankles swelled, and well, it just wasn't fun.  Now I've built up enough endurance to walk 3.2 miles a day without stopping, at a very fast clip for one with such short legs (about 3.6 mph).  My thighs and knees still complain, but not as much.  My right hip makes funny noises and hurts a little, probably because my right knee is my bad one and I walk out of balance.

I have discovered sweating!  My entire life I would be the one that didn't sweat, even in 100 degree temps.  Now, I have to wear a headband, sweat still runs down my face, and the headband comes home dripping wet.  My guess is that for the first time in a very long time I'm fully hydrated!  I drink about 12 cups of water a day.  Okay, not all water - usually 2 cups of coffee in the morning, lots of water during the day, then 1 or 2 cups of herbal tea before bed.

Now that I can eat real food, I have to deal with the times (especially at night) where I'm bored and really, really, want something salty and crunchy.  Or sweet.  And I admit I've given in to that more than once.  It'll be a life long struggle for me I guess.  I have to keep forgiving myself so that I can move on and do better.

Surprisingly, to me, what's not hard is not drinking alcohol.  I've had a couple of glasses of wine twice, but didn't feel the need to continue.

Victories?  I've lost inches when I haven't lost pounds.  And I still have lost pounds - 26 since surgery!  I fit into that pair of size 10 jeans I bought as an incentive.  Barely, but I fit.  Two years ago I logged my weight at the lowest ever (for exactly one day), and I have exactly 3.8 pounds to lose to get there again.  I'm walking my very first 5k tomorrow (the Run or Dye) in Fargo.  I'll come home covered in a rainbow of colors.  And sweaty.  But victorious!